July 3rd, 2013

When in the course of comic events, it becomes necessary for one reviewer to dissolve the storylines and characters of popular culture, and to assume among the superpowers of whatever books we like, the separation between my feet and the ground in whatever degree I choose, a decent respect to the opinions of market demographics requires that they should declare which books are worthy and which are not.

I hold these truths to be self-evident that all books are worthy of criticism, that their creators are mortal creatures, capable of mortal failing, and thus must be called out on when those failings are published. The consumer has the inalienable right to buy satisfactory reading material – books of character, emotional gravitas, and thrilling plots – and when that material becomes destructive to that purpose, it is the duty of vigilant reviewers to mock it ceaselessly.

On this week of celebrating the independence of these United States (suck it, England), I look at four powerhouse titles of the publishing world and, heedless of their position, commit myself to absolute honesty about their successes or failures.

(CC Note: So you’re going to do the exact same thing you do every week, you lazy slob?) (Shut up!)

Guardians of the Galaxy - Tomorrow’s Avengers (Bendis/ Oeming, Doyle, & del Mundo): The latest iteration of Guardians of the Galaxy has been in production for a quarter year now, and has no signs of slowing down. So naturally, this is the perfect time to actually introduce some of the major players in that book.

This is an anthology of sorts, consisting of four short stories, each focusing on one of the non-human members of the Guardians and what they do when they don’t have to play nice with others. Each Guardian gets their own artist (except for the two Gs, Gamora and Groot - they have to share). Each episode showcases just how much trouble each character can get into on their own, the implication being they’re capable of that much more when they work together. Some act more selfishly than others, but everyone has their own agenda.

This is a good introduction to characters that are usually part of an ensemble cast get individual moments in the spotlight. The problem is that they’re brief moments about half a year too late. The other problem is that these moments are quickly snatched away by the all-knowing somewhat-human that takes them out of their solitude just when it’s getting interesting. The artistic styles compliment the differences between the characters well enough, and while none of them are standard, they’re not especially challenging to the standard either.

This is a fair collection of vignettes to one of the more interesting space soap operas being published today. The high cover price will dissuade casual readers, but fans will think it’s worth it.

Superior Foes of Spider-Man 1 (Spencer/ Lieber): The role of Spider-Man has been filled by one of his greatest villains for a while now, who’s decided to be better than the original ever could be. In a few ways, he’s succeeded, mostly by becoming Big Brother where the supervillain community is concerned. It’s making it very difficult to “earn” a living under such conditions, but not impossible.

Boomerang has a good pitching arm, a decent sales pitch, and absolutely nothing else going for him right now. Now that Spider-Man’s rounded up all the serious sinisters, all Boomerang has to work with are newbies and C-listers. With so little to work with, it’s no wonder he gets pinched five pages in. His hard-gathered cabal of allies are happy to let him rot in prison and let his pet die, so he has to let them in on a big score he’d been saving up on.

What this issue accomplished was to demonstrate - not tell, demonstrate - how low-rung the characters are. They want way more than they can grasp, they don’t even try that hard to get it, and the smartest, most dedicated among them is an abusive punching bag whose grand strategy is that the Law of Averages will one day work out in his favor. The climax of this story won’t be when Spider-Man takes them down. At this rate, it’ll be a dramatic success if he even notices they’re around.

Before I first opened this book, I wondered why I should be interested in what the bad guys are up to. Having finished the book, I still don’t know.

Green Lantern 22 (Venditti/ Tan): I haven’t read a Green Lantern book in a long time, certainly not since the main title’s creative change-up. A colleague pointed this out to me with  the end of a yard-stick, and in the interest of fairness (and to get him to stop), I agreed to give it a look.

The Guardians of Oa are gone. They left a distinctive gap in the hierarchy of the cosmos, and Hal Jordan is doing his absolute best to keep this universe running. Larfleeze, the paragon of Greed, doesn’t see this as a hindrance so much as an opportunity - just as Jordan advanced his position, Larfleeze wants to advance his collection by robbing Oa blind. Oddly enough certain pieces of Oa’s collection would just as soon strike out on their own.

Here’s a Green Lantern book that accomplishes a very tricky balance well - it gives Hal Jordan critical character moments and recognizes at the same time that he’s not the most interesting character in his own book. Jordan has been given command over a universal police force, and with that command, he’s got an excuse to hand off the emotional action and doubts - in short, being human - to the aliens. It’s odd, but it works.

This seems like an odd place to jump right in, so I wouldn’t advise new readers to pick it up. Regular readers should be pleased.

Dexter 1 (Lindsay/ Talajic): What is it about people named Dexter being lab jockeys? It seems like gross typecasting to me, but maybe I just don’t know enough Dexters to get a real sense of things. Any readers out there named Dexter, please shout out and help us understand whether or not your name is a sentence to 2,000 hours of clinical trial.

What if there was such a thing as a well-adjusted serial killer? That’s been the driving force behind the Dexter franchise throughout all its incarnations. In this story, he’s driven to his high school reunion by his wife’s insistence that they go so she can get a better sense of where he came from. That’s like saying “I want to know how fruit bowls are made so I’ll talk to a table saw”, but he’s willing to go through with it anyway. That might be a mistake, for one of the people from his class got to see a side of him not many survive encountering, and that bit of knowledge running around is bound to cause problems.

Mass-murdering sociopaths didn’t care for high-school. The people they love most in the world can piss them off and make them do stuff they hate. They get agitated when their professional and personal lives get mixed up. According to the world of Dexter, mass-murdering sociopaths are not misunderstood creatures, they are exactly like everyone else, they just have a lower tolerance for annoyances than most. Lindsay, the author behind the novels, continues to make at least one mass-murdering sociopath likable. Talajic has an understated style that lends itself well to the story and character.

Anyone that has read the novels, watched the show, or has thought to themselves how much nicer things would be if certain people just weren’t around anymore, will find plenty to like about this book. Younger readers won’t, unless they happen to call cornfields home.

Over two-hundred years ago, some people across the pond read something that changed the world forever after. I’m not suggesting that anything at Comic Carnival could spark a revolution, just some imagination. If nothing else, buying a comic would be a great way to capture the color and brightness of fireworks without the burning smell or possible ear damage. See you next week!