I’m pretty sure the printing industry was developed due to rain. See, it didn’t matter if you were a hunter, gatherer, or supervisor, if you couldn’t leave you cave/ hut/ whatever, you couldn’t get food. You had to do something to not think about how long it might be until you could eat again, so what else is there to do but draw on walls. Seriously, what else, TALK to people? Please.
There’s something about reading during inclimate weather that just hits us on a primal level. It’s the earliest form of escapism. It gives the mind something to do when there’s nothing else, and if the distraction is really good, the mind (and eventually, the body) benefits from it long after the reading’s done. If it’s really bad, we’ve got something to complain about. Either way, we win. And speaking of winners, the crop this week is pretty good.
Hawkeye 11 (Fraction/ Aja): This is the issue everyone (CC Note: Ryan…) that I’VE been waiting for ever since I heard they were doing it half a year ago: the Pizza Dog issue. It’s the classic story about a dog and his man, only they cut the man out to make room for more dog. I had this built up so much in my head I was a bit afraid to read this for fear that it wouldn’t hold up. I need not have worried.
Pizza Dog, AKA Lucky, AKA Arrow, has a pretty good life. He’s got a home, interesting neighbors, plenty of food, and one eye. His roommate, Clint Barton, AKA Hawkeye, AKA Hawkguy, barely spends any time in their apartment, but Pizza Dog finds plenty to do. He solves mysteries, he seduces fair ladies with troubled pasts, he fights off dastardly villains that have hideous fashion sense, and basically is everything a good dog should be. And then he breaks your heart.
Pizza Dog, AKA Lucky, AKA Arrow, has a pretty good life. He’s got a home, interesting neighbors, plenty of food, and one eye. His roommate, Clint Barton, AKA Hawkeye, AKA Hawkguy, barely spends any time in their apartment, but Pizza Dog finds plenty to do. He solves mysteries, he seduces fair ladies with troubled pasts, he fights off dastardly villains that have hideous fashion sense, and basically is everything a good dog should be. And then he breaks your heart.
What floored me about this issue wasn’t the way the story told the reader things, which went beyond innovative and became renovative. It was how much HAPPENED in this issue. This was the dog issue – so long as they told any story from a dog’s perspective well, they’d have done well, and they did that. On top of that, though, there was forshadowing of a family reunion, startling revelations about who exactly lives in Hawkeye’s building, first blood drawn between hero and new villain, and an ending that drastically changes the dynamic of the book. The story progressed in a real, meaningful way, it connected on an emotional level, and it did it from the perspective of a housepet in such a way that it absolutely could not have happened any other way. More happened here than in most mainstream books.
I’m a cat person and loved this book. If you’re a dog person, you will need two copies so you can frame one. If you’re not a pet person at all, you may become one by the end.
Uncanny 1 (Diggle/ Campbell): I’m as surprised as you are, surely, but Marvel has not copyrighted the title “Uncanny”. (CC Note: Copyright doesn’t protect titles. And don’t call me Shirley.) This isn’t about a world that hates and fears a certain kind of person, this is about a world that wants to cheat and take all your money.
Weaver is not a man with a particular set of skills. That would be limiting. Instead, he has whatever set of skills he can get his hands on, and he makes as much money as he can with each set. Lately, that hasn’t been much, and his latest scheme to bluff the ultimate bluffer backfired. He’s pretty sure he’s been set up, he doesn’t know by whom, about all he knows is that it’s time to move on. That doesn’t work out for him too well, either.
Weaver is not a man with a particular set of skills. That would be limiting. Instead, he has whatever set of skills he can get his hands on, and he makes as much money as he can with each set. Lately, that hasn’t been much, and his latest scheme to bluff the ultimate bluffer backfired. He’s pretty sure he’s been set up, he doesn’t know by whom, about all he knows is that it’s time to move on. That doesn’t work out for him too well, either.
It’s going to stand out very quickly that Weaver has the mental part of a certain X-man’s powers. Weaver spends most of the issue mentally kicking himself over how he’s misused himself the past year, even though he’s been in a place where his own brand of enterprise should thrive. He’s fairly clever, very quick on the uptake, and processes new data and situations fast enough, but for some reason nothing seems to gel. It’s a collection of attributes than sound great together, and yet if the reader thinks about it they don’t quite make sense. Diggle broke into comics with Losers, which went on to become a movie of a similar charm, so this isn’t a shock. Campbell brings life to the story, and again it’s nothing groundbreaking, but it is sufficient.
This is classic fun reading – mostly eye candy and fair distraction from whatever else is going on in your life.
Lazarus 1 (Rucka/ Lark): There are no stumbling men emerging from caves wondering why their blanket smells like a burial shroud in this book. Instead, this is about what happens when women’s mixed martial arts, global finance, and Game of Thrones have a baby.
The world’s wealth and resources are controlled by just a few families, who employ just a few of the rest of the people because if they employed them all, the families wouldn’t have as much money. The rest of the people are treated like Waste and called as much. These families fight each other for more, but since conventional warfare is expensive, they opt for less conventional warfare. They invest in one member of their own to create nigh-immortal superweapons to defend their own interests and offend everyone else’s. These people of mass destruction keep the title of Lazarus, and the Carlyle family’s Lazarus is named Forever. Forever’s developing a nasty habit: she’s starting to think for herself, and that thinking doesn’t mesh with the rest of the family’s. Maybe she’s taken too many bullets to the everything.
The world’s wealth and resources are controlled by just a few families, who employ just a few of the rest of the people because if they employed them all, the families wouldn’t have as much money. The rest of the people are treated like Waste and called as much. These families fight each other for more, but since conventional warfare is expensive, they opt for less conventional warfare. They invest in one member of their own to create nigh-immortal superweapons to defend their own interests and offend everyone else’s. These people of mass destruction keep the title of Lazarus, and the Carlyle family’s Lazarus is named Forever. Forever’s developing a nasty habit: she’s starting to think for herself, and that thinking doesn’t mesh with the rest of the family’s. Maybe she’s taken too many bullets to the everything.
This is a very gritty parable of Occupy Wall Street, with all the power of the world held by 0.0000000001% of the people. There’s a very consistent and different mentality behind everything that goes on in this world, which makes the most extreme alternatives to the world remarkably believable. Forever balances being a diamond-hard badass with emerging layers of empathy. Rucka’s a veteran writer with novel series and multiple Batman titles under his belt, and Lark has about as many artistic notches on his own bedpost. These two bringing all their talents to one project means a beautiful book with plenty of depth, character, and intrigue.
This is your chance to get in on the ground floor with a brand new series from creators that are known to create enthralling series. I do suggest you take it.
Batman Superman 1 (Pak/ Lee): It just wouldn’t be Variant Coverage if there wasn’t a book I tore apart. The winner of the short straw this week goes to some sort of prequel/ alternate universe type thingy. Seriously, if anyone out there can figure out what this is, let me know. This is as close as I can figure…
This issue looks back to the first time Batman and Superman teamed up in the New 52 universe: in an age before the two had ever met, someone is killing Wayne Enterprises employees working in Metropolis, and intrepid reporter Clark Kent is working the story. He finds a lead sitting on a bench in grubby street garb – boy billionaire Bruce Wayne. Between the two of them, they chase down the most likely suspects and find their alter egos at the scene of the crime with a fresh corpse. The misunderstandings start from there and they don’t stop.
This issue looks back to the first time Batman and Superman teamed up in the New 52 universe: in an age before the two had ever met, someone is killing Wayne Enterprises employees working in Metropolis, and intrepid reporter Clark Kent is working the story. He finds a lead sitting on a bench in grubby street garb – boy billionaire Bruce Wayne. Between the two of them, they chase down the most likely suspects and find their alter egos at the scene of the crime with a fresh corpse. The misunderstandings start from there and they don’t stop.
Stylistically, this is a very interesting book. Juxtaposing children at work and the HR Giger-planned city that is Gotham City is a difficult job for the best of artists, and Jae Lee makes it work. It’s a shame he can’t render Batman or Superman as interestingly. As far as the story goes, it completely shifts at least three times, awkwardly and without any kind of connection. It doesn’t just jump genres, it jumps time periods, multiverse, personality traits, and in the background I’m pretty sure I saw a shark get jumped. Burn.
A retelling of the beginning to one of the greatest superhero team-ups of all time would be an exciting thing to read. Maybe we’ll see it one day.
And I’ll see you next week!
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